Me (Sourita): You said that last week. And the week before. Words are easy, Idrees. I need more than words. Idrees: Then I’ll make it real. I’ll book my flight. I’ll step into Kolkata. I’ll see you. I’ll hold you. And you’ll know I’m not just talking this time.
Me: (My heart raced as I typed, unsure if I believed him, yet desperate to) Fine. But I warn you… Nothing will stop me from reminding you we’re not talking about a future. This is just now. Just us. Hook-up. Secret.
Idrees: I know. And that’s why I’m coming. Nothing else matters when I’m with you. I’ll take what I want. And you’ll surrender just like I imagined. The messages left me trembling — part excitement, part fear, part the addictive pull of the forbidden. For the first time, I could almost see him, feel him, in Kolkata. It was Friday evening. I was scrolling through my phone, trying not to expect anything… when a message from Idrees appeared. Idrees: Get yourself ready. Flight tomorrow morning. My heart skipped. My stomach flipped. Part of me screamed this is real, he’s actually coming, and part of me froze — what if I’m not ready? What if I regret it? Me (Sourita): Tomorrow morning? Are you serious?
Idrees: Dead serious. No more waiting, no more screens. I’ll be in Kolkata by noon. Be ready, Sourita. I want every inch of you. I could hardly breathe. For weeks, months, even in imagination, I had built this. And now… it was happening. He was coming. I spent the rest of the evening in a haze — imagining his tall, strong body stepping off the flight, imagining the first moment our eyes met, imagining the forbidden heat of what we had promised each other. This was no longer just words. This was real. Before he even boarded, my phone buzzed again. It was him. Idrees: Before I leave… booked a hotel in Kolkata. Everything ready. Just for us. My heart raced, my fingers trembling as I typed back.
Me (Sourita): You really booked it? Right here in my city?
Idrees: Yes. No turning back now. By tomorrow morning, I’ll be there. And you’ll see that all this talk… was nothing compared to reality.
I stared at the message, part of me shaking with excitement, part of me trying to stay composed. The forbidden was coming alive. For hours, I couldn’t think straight. I imagined the hotel room — the door opening, him stepping in, the tall, strong figure I had been addicted to finally standing in front of me. My body responded before my mind could even process it. Everything was about to change. Even as excitement coursed through me, part of me couldn’t ignore the truth. He was Idrees, a married man with three adolescents. A part of me whispered warnings I didn’t want to hear: He’s not yours.
This is wrong. What if someone finds out? And yet, another part of me ached for him — his strong body, his commanding presence, the way he had slowly taken over my thoughts and fantasies. I told myself, this is just a secret hook-up. Nothing more. But still… my heart pounds like it’s betraying me. The fear made it more forbidden. The fear made it sharper. The fear… made it irresistible. Even as I got ready for the next morning, imagining him walking into my life, that little voice reminded me: He has a family. This is dangerous. But desire drowned out caution. The next morning, I woke to a message from Idrees.
Idrees: Landed. Heading to the hotel now. When can I come see you? My heart skipped. This was it — he was really here. Me (Sourita): Evening… after office. Can’t go before that. Idrees: Fine. I’ll wait. But know this — I’ve been imagining this moment for weeks. I won’t hold back when I see you. I stared at the screen, my mind spinning. Part of me was nervous — the reality of him being a married man in my city still lingered.
But the other part of me… was trembling with anticipation, imagining his tall, strong body stepping into the hotel room where we would finally be alone. All day, I went through work on autopilot, my thoughts slipping back to him. Every minute, every hour, the forbidden pull grew stronger. By the time the office ended, I was already aching for him. Even though I told him to wait, I could almost feel him there, waiting, ready… ready to turn our months of secret talk into reality. During lunch, I nervously typed him a question I couldn’t stop thinking about.
Me (Sourita): Idrees… condoms? Will you use them? His reply came almost instantly, sending a shiver down my spine.
Idrees: No. I don’t use. I want it raw, Sourita. I want every bit of you without anything between us. I stared at the screen, heart pounding. Part of me panicked — the danger, the taboo, the sheer intensity of what he was saying — but another part of me burned with desire. Everything about him was forbidden, and now he wanted it even riskier. The idea that he wanted to take me raw, without any protection, made it all the more consuming, more addictive, more intoxicating. I typed back, almost trembling:
Me (Sourita): Idrees… are you serious?
Idrees: Dead serious. I’ve imagined this for so long. When I see you tonight, nothing will be held back. Nothing. Even as fear mixed with excitement, I knew one thing — tonight, everything I had imagined about him, about us… would finally come alive. That afternoon, I slipped away during lunch and went to Spencer’s. My hands trembled as I chose something daring — a transparent bra and matching panties. It wasn’t for anyone but him. It was for the moment when all our months of secret messages would collide with reality.
